Pic courtesy- https://selflove575.home.blog/2020/09/13/beyond-right-and-wrong/
The Misconception of Right and Wrong
Some time ago, I read somewhere, “Just because you are right, does not mean I am wrong”. In today’s environment, it fits perfectly. Today, if you talk to anybody, you will find that they are well equipped with all the information, knowledge, and wisdom to prove their version or argument to be right. The irony is that it does not stop here. Further, they prove the other person wrong in their endeavor to prove themselves right.
Today, there’s a misconception about discussions and arguments that in the process of proving your version right, the other person automatically becomes wrong. We can observe it in daily talks, discourse, and general discussions. Everybody is hyper-informed, because of which they are not left with any space to entertain the version of the other person. Today, people are more apt to argue than having the space and faculty to develop an understanding with the objective of the discussion.
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The Temptation of Judgment
When we believe something to be right, we are likely to fall into the temptation to judge the other person. In case they are not supporting our line of thought or belief, we are certainly going to tag them as wrong. Just imagine a situation when two people are part of a discussion with the same objective, same process, and both are technically right as well. Yet, they are still telling each other that the other person is wrong. I have seen many times people have caused strife and sometimes done serious relationship damage with no benefit whatsoever in an effort “only to be right”.
The Overrated Nature of Being Right
Instead of accepting the other person’s version, people find it far easier to forgive others for being wrong. Similarly, we will find rare instances of knowing that you have been wrong than a lifetime of always being right. People don’t understand that what starts to undermine the relationship is “I am right, you are wrong”. People forget that being right is overrated when it comes at the expense of being kind. Fundamentally, in the need to be right is the desire to put ourselves above others, which is preceded by insecurities and false pride or ego.
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Individual Perspectives and Social Standards
Each person, because of their brain functioning and unique personality, looks at things and receives information differently from each other. So, the lens through which they will possibly receive information in the process is going to be different. People today are trapped in the complex web of being right or wrong and make their lives full of woes and strife.
Pic courtesy – https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/evolution-of-the-self/202311/seeing-both-sides-and-embracing-a-fresh-perspective
In a way, we can say that there’s nothing right and nothing wrong. It’s only the individual perspective which takes us to the conclusion with the help of a thought pattern set in by a unique algorithm in our brain. Still, as human beings, we have set certain social, moral, ethical, and other benchmarks to standardize a pattern in this world.
Integrating Virtues for Better Communication
If we integrate a few virtues, we will never be locked into the need to be right. Openness is one of them. When we don’t cling to the desire to be right, we listen to the other person and communicate on a much deeper level that has more understanding and recognition with less apprehension and resistance.
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In addition to openness, a not-so-strong attachment trait gives us the freedom to communicate without the pressure to be right. The need to be right is deeply rooted in our insecurities of missing out and hurting our pride or ego. We can take a deep breath and swallow our pride when someone doesn’t accept our mode of interpretation. In this situation, it’s more important how we handle the situation than to focus on whether we are right or wrong.
Choosing Kindness Over Being Right
When we believe we have been wronged, many times we want to prove to the one who has hurt or deceived us just how wrong they are. In that situation, instead of sharing our feelings imbued with a commitment to forgiveness, we tend to retaliate in the same pitch, higher intensity, and in the same mode.
Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “When given a choice between being right and being kind, choose to be kind.” We always struggle with the self-doubt of our ego with the insecurity of being wrong. The fact is that “A threatened ego always reacts”. Now it’s our own choice whether we have to choose harmony in life or stress by getting into undesirable arguments.
Tags: #Approach, #Dialogue, #ego, #environment, #forgive, #getgreengetgrowing, #gngagritech, #greenstories, #nature, #relationship, #Right, #Wrong
